He Might Want To Go Easy On The Milk And Cookies That Night

(I work at a local costume shop, and it’s right before Christmas. We get a lot of calls reserving Santa suits. The following happens over one of these calls.)

Me: “Hello. This is [Store]. [My Name] speaking; how can I help you today?”

Santa: “Hi. I want to know if you rent Santa suits?”

Me: “We sure do! We have our most popular deluxe Santa that comes with [high-quality accessories] for [price]. Our next most popular is our mid-grade [Santa] that comes with [less accessories] for [lower price].”

Santa: “I’ll take the deluxe Santa for [date].”

(I get his measurements and set up the reservation.)

Me: “And you are ready to go! Is there anything else?”

Santa: “Yeah, I have a question. Do you sell adult diapers? ”

(I laugh because I think he’s joking. But I soon realise he isn’t.)

 Me: “W-what? No. I would suggest going to a grocery store?”

Santa: “Well, that’s just a lot of accessories. It would be hard to take all that off just to use the bathroom.”

Me: “…”

Santa: “…”

Me: “No. We don’t sell adult diapers.”

(We made sure to wash his Santa suit an extra time after he returned it, just in case.)