He He He

It’s after hours, and we have just finished giving a beloved manager their farewell party. A cluster of balloons is stuck to the ceiling, while others droop in the corner or dangle in the doorway arch. Now that the party is over, some of us are being big kids by taking the helium balloons off the ceiling and doing exactly what you’d expect.

Coworker #1: *Laughing, chipmunk voice.* “Oh my god! Follow the yellow brick road!”

Coworker #2: *Already squeaky.* “We sound like the Minions. BANANA!”

Everyone laughs. A few people grab more floating balloons, inhaling the helium and testing out their best cartoon impressions. [Coworker #3] grabs a balloon from the floor, pops it, and takes a big inhale.

Coworker #3: “Alright, my turn. Heeeey—Wait. What gives? Why don’t I sound funny?”

Coworker #1: “Uh… you took one from the floor.”

Coworker #3: “So?”

Coworker #2: “So… that’s not helium.”

Coworker #3: “Wait. What do you mean? I thought all balloons are filled with helium?”

Coworker #1: “Not ALL balloons. Only the ones that float.” *Points to ceiling balloons.* “Those are helium.”

Coworker #3: “…So what’s in this one?”

Coworker #1: “Air.”

Coworker #2: *Grinning.* “…from my lungs!”

There’s a beat of silence as the realization sinks in. [Coworker #3] suddenly pales.

Coworker 3: *Coughing, gagging.* “Oh my god, ugh, gross!” *Starts fanning tongue for some reason.* “That’s so disgusting!”

They bolt for the breakroom sink, hacking dramatically. A second later, they sprint past the group toward the front door. They come rushing back in, mouthwash in hand. The sound of their gargling, accompanied by the sounds of chipmunks laughing, made for quite the harmony!