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He Can Water Slide Right On Out Of There

, , , , | Right | October 29, 2020

I’m a young teenage girl working as a lifeguard to earn some extra money. I’m at the bottom of the stairs to the water slides, measuring kids to make sure they reach the height requirement.

I’m twirling my whistle around my finger when four men in their late twenties, maybe early thirties walk by me. Three of them keep walking, but one of them just stops and stares at me. I wait to see if he’ll walk away, but he just keeps staring at me, so I speak up.

Me: “Hello, sir! Is there anything I can help you with?”

Guest: *Laughs* “Yes, I think there is.” *Steps closer* “Those are some pretty deft fingers you’ve got there.”

I immediately stop twirling the whistle.

Me: “If there’s nothing I can help you with, please continue up the stairs to the slides, or turn around and enjoy the rest of the park.”

Guest: *Inching even closer* “You can help me by telling me when your shift ends, and then show me what else you can do with those fingers.”

This man is more than ten years my senior. I lean forward and look him dead in the eyes.

Me: “You want to know what I’ll be doing with my fingers once my shift ends?”

Guest: *Nods eagerly*

Me: “Pleasuring my girlfriend.”

Guest: *Violent whole body recoil* “You… you’re a f****** [homosexual slur]!”

He thrusts his finger at my face.

Guest: “You should have told me you were a [slur], you dirty b****!”

Me: *Smiling smugly* “If there’s anything else I can help you with, please let me know; otherwise, you can continue up the stairs to the slides, or enjoy the rest of the park.”

Guest: “This is ridiculous! This is f****** ridiculous! You’re going to Hell, you ugly b****.”

He turned around to storm off, and he got maybe five steps away before slipping and falling.

After my shift ended, I learned that he demanded to see my manager, and then he was removed from the park after my manager told him that half the staff were “f****** [slurs]” and he’d been interacting with them all day.

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