HDM-Lie

(I managed to order the wrong length of HDMI cable online. With delivery dates long, and no TV, I visit the local large chain computer store.)

Me: “Excuse me, where are the HDMI cables?”

Worker #1: “Oh, I think they are over there somewhere.” *gestures vaguely*

Me: “Oh, okay, thanks.”

(I eventually find the display, completely in the wrong direction, and pick out some items.)

Worker #1: “Oh, good you found them.” *looking at the items I’ve picked* “Oh, you don’t want those ones.”

Me: “Sorry?”

Worker #1: “That cable is far too long. The picture will be very poor quality. Here, this is the one you want.”

(He picks up the most expensive cable a meter shorter than I needed.)

Me: “Oh, err, no thanks. I need one at least four meters long. These will do fine.”

Worker #1: “No, no, no, just move the TV closer. You really need a better quality cable.”

(Worker #1 pushes the cable into my hands and tries to snatch the cheaper ones from me.)

Me: *recoiling in surprise* “I can’t move the TV closer, and I assure you these will be fine.”

Worker #1: “Look, I know what I’m talking about. You need these ones. Long cables will lose the picture.” *a lie*

Me: *exhausted* “So these cheaper ones won’t work?”

Worker #1: “No. You need the better ones.”

Me: “So why do you sell them?”

Worker #1: “I er, well these are just far better. Listen I know what I’m talking about. Hey, [Worker #2], come here a second. Can you PLEASE explain why he wants these ones and not the cheap ones.”

Worker #2: “Well, these cables will give you a much better picture. The cheaper ones won’t give you 1080p.” *another lie*

Me: “I’ve had enough. These will be fine. This is the end of the discussion. I’m paying and leaving.”

(I eventually get past the two workers. They still call out to me as I get to the till.)

Cashier: “Oh, are you sure you want these? We have an offer on [Expensive Brand] cables this week.”

Me: “No, thanks.”

Cashier: “Are you sure? These ones will break much faster than the better ones.” *lies again*

Me: “Ring me up.”

Cashier: “I was just trying to—”

Me: “Ring me up now; if I hear one more lie from you or your colleagues I will register a complaint.”

Cashier: “Fine.” *throws the cable at me*

(Safe to say, I never shopped there again.)