Having To Shampoo-poo Most Of The Coupons

(By the end of my four-year reign as a cashier, I am pretty done with my job. We have this one regular coupon scammer who comes through the express lane with too many items to hold people up and fluster the cashier into taking her coupons. One day, I see them in my line and decide I’m done with them, too.)

Customer: *starts unloading stuff onto the belt, mostly trial-size shampoos and deodorants*

Me: *scans things extra slowly, paying attention to the items* 

Customer: “Here. Take these.” *thrusts coupons in my direction*

Me: “Of course.”

(Before scanning them, I decide to take my time reading the entirety of the fine print of the coupon while the scammer gets antsy. It’s for $1 off shampoo and unsurprisingly, excludes trial-size items.)

Customer: “Are you new? You’re just supposed to scan them. That’s how coupons work, sweetie.”

Me: *puts on my best customer service smile* “Unfortunately, this coupon says it doesn’t include trial-size items, so this type of shampoo won’t count.”

Customer: “Yeah, but if you scan it, it’ll take it off.”

Me: *scans it to humor them, and it’s rejected* “Sorry, the register won’t accept it.”

Customer: *exasperated sigh* “Well, the cashiers normally take it off anyway when the register doesn’t work.”

Me: “I wouldn’t be able to do that myself; I could get a manager—”

Customer: “Whatever! Just put the shampoos back! Try this coupon.”

(I did the same thing again as a line started to form behind them. The next coupon was the same type of deal and I said it couldn’t be accepted. I went through their whole stack of coupons and most of them weren’t usable. The scammer eventually got frustrated enough that they stormed out without buying anything and I just smiled as I put everything back in my returns bin. I know a lot of cashiers and managers usually would just put the coupons through so they wouldn’t cause a fuss but hey, sometimes it’s the petty little things in life.)