Having A Grand(mother) Old Time

(I’m doing a grocery run with my ten-month-old daughter, and a middle-aged woman takes a peek at her sitting in the stroller. I also have a babyface.)

Middle-Aged Woman: “Oh, what a cutie! And look at those little shoes!”

Me: “Yep, Grandma has good taste!”

(I head to the ice cream aisle to find my husband and the woman catches up to me again.)

Middle-Aged Woman: “Excuse me, did you say the baby is your grandchild?”

Me: “Oh, no, she’s my daughter. Her grandmother that bought her shoes lives near Boston.”

Middle-Aged Woman: *visibly relieved* “Oh! I was thinking you would have to have gotten pregnant at twelve for her to be your grandchild!”

Me: “Well, I’m almost forty, so I’m technically old enough to have grandkids.”

(The woman gave me the biggest deer-in-headlights look and beat a hasty retreat.)