Has A Couple Of Problems

(My mom is very conservative, and any time a couple shows PDA, she yells, even in movies. I don’t like it either, but my school is chock full of couples, and my mom thinks that I’m just exaggerating. One day, she goes to visit me in school, and is shocked. She finds me, grabs me, and we go to her car and get in.)

Mom: “I just saw this couple walking together, and the guy had his arm around the girl’s shoulders. They stopped to talk with a teacher, and the guy reached in the girl’s shirt and started massaging her boob!”

Me: *not surprised* “Oh, really. That is SO surprising.”

Mom: “Can you believe they would do that in public? You young people are SO shameless!”

(She treated me to an earful about how messed up my generation is, and how future generations will be even more so. So thank you, couple who couldn’t wait, for upsetting her and have her lecture at me for hours!)