Hard Truths About Software

Intern: “I need [expensive suite of software] for [tasks].” 

Department Head: “We need [expensive suite of software] for an intern in the department!”

(I, the IT mook, order the expensive suite of software for an intern in the department.)

Department Head: “Great! Hey, do you know of any experts on [expensive suite of software] so I can learn how to use what I demanded?”