Happy Holidaze

(I am a customer in line at a convenience store. There is one man in front of me who pays for a chocolate milk and leaves. As the cashier is checking me out, the customer with the chocolate milk comes barging back into the store.)

Customer: “Dude, you need to let me exchange this milk. It is out of date!”

Cashier: “Of course. If the milk is out of date, you may certainly get another one.”

(The cashier takes the milk and sets it aside without looking at it while he continues to check me out. The customer disappears toward the back of the store and then comes stomping back to the counter less than a minute later.)

Customer: “ALL of your milks are out of date! What sort of place is this?!”

Cashier: “Really? We just had a delivery…” *checks the date of the chocolate milk he set aside earlier* “This milk is still good! It says December 12th.”

Customer: “Dude, the 12th was at the BEGINNING of the month! We’re at the END of the month!”

Cashier: “No, sir. Today is December 10th.”

Customer: “Nuh-uh! Today is the 26th! Yesterday was Christmas!”

(The cashier shows the customer a calendar hanging behind the counter.)

Cashier: “No, sir. We haven’t had Christmas yet. It’s only December 10th, and Christmas isn’t until the 25th.”

Customer: *dazed look* “Dude…I like, dreamed that yesterday was Christmas! I guess I didn’t get a new car from my Grandma, either. I thought somebody stole it!” *takes his milk and leaves*

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