Hammer-Time

(My classmate is trying to buy a drink from the vending machine. He puts in $10, but the machine just eats it without dispensing anything. This infuriates him, so he starts kicking and punching the machine.)

Classmate: “F****** MACHINE! GIVE ME MY MONEY BACK!”

(Our instructor walks in and sees this happening.)

Instructor: “Hey, hey, HEY! Stop that! You’re a grown-a** man; you shouldn’t be throwing a f****** tantrum! What the h*** is wrong with you?!”

Classmate: “I’m sorry about that, sir. I know this doesn’t justify it, but the machine ate my $10.”

Instructor: “What I was about to say is that you’re an adult; you should solve this problem like an adult. You’re in trade school for f***’s sake; use a god-d*** hammer!”