Half-Time Half-Wit

I am ushering for the school play of “Into The Woods.” The end of the first act is notorious for being taken as the ending of the whole show. A father and his young son come up to me.

Father: “Is it half-time now?” 

Half-time is for sports; at plays, musicals, and operas, this is called intermission.

Me: “Uh… yes, it’s intermission, sir.” 

Father: “Okay.” *Turns to son* “It’s half-time!” 

Me: “…”