Grim Re-Tailer
CONTENT WARNING: Mention of death
We’ve had this one department manager for years. She was infamous across the entire store for being cruel, two-faced, and downright hateful.
She once told a cashier who used a cane, “If you can’t stand for eight hours straight, you shouldn’t be working here.”
When a Black coworker wore their natural hair, she said, “That’s unprofessional. You should fix that if you want to move up.”
She told a gay coworker, “You don’t need time off for your kind of wedding. It’s not real anyway.”
She lived to make everyone miserable. She would purposefully put people on shifts when she knew they had other plans, especially religious holidays that weren’t her religion. She got some kind of perverse pleasure out of her power plays. Staff turnover with her was through the roof.
One Monday morning, though, she doesn’t show up. We’re all curious… until we hear the news: over the weekend, she passed away from a heart attack.
There’s this strange silence at first, then a ripple of shock. Nobody cheers, nobody gloats… but also, not one single person pretends to be sad. You could almost feel the collective relief.
Cut to later that morning. The regional manager is making a visit to the store. He calls us all into the break room for an announcement.
Regional Manager: *Somber tone.* “I’m sure you’re all sad to hear about the passing of [Dead Manager’s Name].”
Several of the younger staff choke back laughter. A few heads drop to hide grins.
Regional Manager: “Show some respect!”
Our supervisor walks over to the regional manager and cautiously says:
Supervisor: “I’ll tell them to, [Regional Manager], but you might want to read the room. Didn’t you notice when you came into the store that the ‘Wicked Witch Is Dead’ song has been looping on the store speakers all morning?”
The regional manager blinks, realizes, and gives the shortest, most clinical update imaginable before leaving the break room and the whole store, immediately.
That supervisor was promoted to store manager, and we’ve all been a lot happier.
