Green With The Terminology

(I’m telling my friend about my dietary restrictions.)

Me: “Yeah, I’m not eating red meat.”

Friend: “I don’t eat red meat either.”

Me: “…Uh, you just ate beef.”

Friend: “That’s not red meat. It’s brown!”

(Sadly she is serious. While I am cracking up, she explains herself:)

Friend: “I thought red meat meant you liked it red when you cooked it! Like rare! It doesn’t mean that?”