Got You Out Of A Pickle

(I travel a lot and always take my four-year-old with me. She seems to always get free stuff but no one believes me. My girlfriends and I decide to do a weekend in Chicago. After getting to the hotel everyone is starving so we get directions to a simple restaurant within walking distance. An older lady seats us and seems super stressed taking our orders. The waitress sets down the plates.)

Me: “Look, pickles! You love pickles!”

(Two minutes later the waitress plops down a plate of extra pickles. My girlfriends and I mumble “Thank you,” all with open mouths of disbelief. A few minutes after that she comes back with a balloon and apologizes for the string being a bit too long.)

Friend #1: “Wow, when she sat us and was really short with us, I thought this was going to be horrible. She’s super nice!”

(We finish and go back to the hotel where the bell hop walks up to my daughter and hands her a stuffed cow.)

Friend #2: “WHAT KIND OF MIRACLE WORKER ARE YOU?!”