Got A Vegetarian Chip On Her Shoulder

(I’ve gone to dinner with a few friends and am sitting next to a friend who is a vegetarian. She is always talking about how being a vegetarian is so healthy.)

Friend: *to her husband* “I can’t decide what to choose; what are you getting?”

Husband: “That’s easy. I’m getting the biggest steak on the menu.”

Friend: “Okay, [My Name], what are you getting?”

Me: “I’m tossing up between [vegetarian meal] and the fish.”

Friend: “Ooh, [vegetarian meal], that sounds nice.” *looks at her menu* “Ew, it’s got vegetables in it. If I wasn’t vegetarian, I’d have the fish.”  

(I point out a few more vegetarian options.)

Friend: *shakes her head at them all* “I’m a vegetarian that doesn’t like vegetables; I guess I’m going with a bowl of hot chips.”

Husband: “We go through this every time, and she always orders the chips. I don’t know why she even looks at the menu.”