Got A Special Middle Finger Just For You

(I am in kindergarten and my mother has come in to discuss why my writing skills were marked “needs improvement” on my report card.)

Mom: “I’m really curious about why you gave [My Name] such a low mark. As far as I can tell his spelling is great and he prints very clearly.”

Teacher: “I know, in those regards he is definitely above average but I’m afraid he doesn’t know how to hold a pencil.”

Mother: *confused* “What are you talking about? He obviously knows how to hold a pencil, otherwise he wouldn’t be able to write.”

Teacher: “He holds it with his thumb and middle finger instead of his second finger.”

(While this is an unusual way to hold a pencil, it should be noted that my father does the same thing. My mom was absolutely fuming from learning this was why my writing grade was so low. After hearing this, she called my father and told him to come to the school immediately. When he arrived, she explained the situation to him and made my teacher watch him write a sentence on a piece of paper. That seemed to clear things up as my report card got edited to show “excellent” for writing skills.)