Goose/Gander; Dog/Dad

, , , , | Related | February 22, 2021

Me: “The dogs thought they wanted my cup of xylitol. I was like, ‘No, this will literally kill you.’”

Dad: “Why were you eating xylitol?”

Me: “I use it for my tea.”

Dad: “Oookay… but why?”

Me: “My teeth don’t hate it. You know how with sugar, you can feel your teeth get angry? Xylitol doesn’t cause that.”

Dad: “Oh, okay.”

Me: “If you want to try it—”

Dad: “No, I read something about it being toxic to dogs, and I was like, well, if it’ll kill my dog, why do I want to eat it?”

Me: “Chocolate will also kill your dog. Should I stop buying you chocolate, then? Is that what you’re saying?”

Dad: “Wait, what? How dare you use my logic against me?!”

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