Gone In 30 Seconds

(We are sitting at the table eating take out burgers.)

Dad: *to my brother* “Hey, go heat this LAST one up for me for about 30 seconds.”

(My brother grabs the last burger and shoves it in his mouth, chewing it as fast as he can and swallows it in record time, then smiles at our father. Dad’s jaw about hits the table, as does Mom’s and our other siblings.)

Dad: “What part of ‘heat it for 30 seconds’ didn’t you understand?”

Brother: “Oh! I thought you said ‘eat it in 30 seconds!'”