Goat Eggs For Veterans

(I work tech support for a satellite company. The customer I’m speaking with is getting a signal lost on one receiver, and we are setting up a service call for a tech. This customer has already stated to me that he’s had a few beers, but has been otherwise normal up until this.)

Me: “Would you have any special instructions for the tech? Gates, animals, hidden driveways?”

Customer: “Can he bring me a goat?”

Me: “I’m sorry. Our tech can’t bring a goat.”

Customer: “But you asked about special instructions. I want him to bring me a goat.”

Me: “He cannot bring you an animal.”

Customer: “What about eggs? Can he bring me eggs?”

Me: “No, sir. He would not have anything like that available to bring.”

Customer: “I bet if I told you I was a veteran, it would be different.”