Glutinous Idiot Maximus

(I work at a group home for adults with cognitive disabilities. Part of my job, among other things, is laundry, cleaning, and cooking. Two of our clients are gluten-free. My coworker is making fried chicken for dinner. It is important to note that this coworker is new and not generally liked as he mainly sits around talking to girls on his phone all day or generally being lazy.)

Coworker: “This plate is the gluten chicken, and this is the gluten-free chicken.”

(My coworker heats up the oil on the stove, and then starts putting the gluten chicken in the oil.)

Me: “Oh, you should have put the gluten-free chicken in first. Now you’re going to have to make a whole new pot of oil because this oil is cross-contaminated.”

Coworker: “I know what cross-contamination is! Besides, the flour is gluten-free, so the breadcrumbs will protect it.”

Me: “Are… are you saying you didn’t use gluten-free breadcrumbs for the gluten-free chicken?”

Coworker: “There’s no gluten in breadcrumbs!”

Me: “What are you talking about? Breadcrumbs are made out of bread; of course, they have gluten!” *takes out gluten-free breadcrumbs* “See?”

Coworker: “Whatever! The oil will burn off the gluten, anyway!”

Me: “That’s not how it works at all! If that was true, people who were gluten-free could just eat fried bread!”

Coworker: “Well, they’ll just have to deal because this is all we have. They’ve had my fried chicken before and no one died!”

Me: “Yeah, their stomach just really hurt after. That’s what happens when they eat gluten. You’re lucky no one here is severely celiac because people can die from eating gluten if they’re allergic enough.”

(My coworker mumbled and went back to cooking. Later, he tried to give coffee with sugar to our diabetic client and then got mad that “no one told him” the client couldn’t have that.)