Giving You A Piece Of My Mind – And My Guts

, , , , , , | Working | August 26, 2019

(I work at a hamburger chain restaurant, but end up having to call out sick. I make sure to call early and speak right to the manager. However, the manager is notoriously lazy, negligent, and incredibly dumb.)

Manager: “You’re just going to have to suck it up and come in.”

Me: “I can’t! I’m puking my guts up!”

Manager: “That’s manageable. We’ll just put a trash can at the end of the grill-line for you.”

Me: “Are you being serious right now?!”

Manager: “Look, [My Name], things are already busy…”

(They aren’t. I have called early enough that the building isn’t even open for business at this time; I know the manager is present with a few prep employees.)

Manager: “…and I just don’t have the time to call around for somebody to replace you. You’re going to have to suck it up and come in.”

(I open my mouth to argue, and instead I give my manager a full auditory experience involving my stomach turning inside out. When I can talk again, I’m pretty sure my voice sounds like the Devil’s.)

Me: “[Manager] if you say that I have to come in one more time, I’ll call the health department as soon as you hang up the phone!”

Manager: *pause* “Come in when you feel better.”

(I do look back on this story with some amusement: apparently the sound of someone vomiting — and/or mentioning the health department — is a 100% effective way to make the laziest manager do their job. Who knew?)

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