Giving The Professor A Bad Name

Student: “[Professor], did you know that there is an inmate on death row in Ohio named [Professor’s Name]?”

Professor: “Maybe it’s my old high school classmate.”

Student: “What?”

Professor: “Well, when I was in high school, there was another [Professor’s Name]. And when I started high school, he was in 10th grade. And when I graduated, he was only in 11th grade. Clearly he wasn’t too bright.”

(The class is amused, but the professor isn’t done.)

Professor: “But that’s not even the worst part. Once, the local newspaper interviewed some high school students about their favorite things to do over the weekend, and the other [Professor’s Name] said he liked to go to the cemetery and make out with girls. I had a tough time convincing my mother that it wasn’t me!”