Getting A Raise With Minimum Effort

(My first job was as “kennel help” in a small vet clinic. I made minimum wage and did everything from cleaning dog poop to assisting with surgery. One day the vet called me into his office.)

Vet: “So you’ve been here for over a year and have done a good job. I’ve decided that you deserve a raise. How does [slightly higher than minimum wage] sound?”

Me: “Really? I get a raise? Cool!”

(I was thrilled to have earned a raise, even if it was only a small one. A few days later I was hanging out with a friend and proudly told them the good news.)

Friend: “So you’re still making minimum wage?”

Me: “No. I got a raise!”

Friend: “You do know they just raised the minimum wage, right?”

Me: “…”

(I checked, and it was true. The “raise” my boss had given me was actually a mandatory raising of the minimum wage.)