Gathering Thoughts Is Like Gathering Ducks

(I’m lying in bed with my boyfriend, and we’re kissing. I have ADHD, and often say weird things by accident if I don’t pay careful attention to my train of thought. I pull away from him, and look into his eyes.)

Me: “You are such a great kisser; your lips are really fantastic. It’s like kissing a goose.”

(My boyfriend frowns a little, and is clearly trying to work out if that’s a compliment or not.)

Me: “Oh, you know what I mean!”

Boyfriend: “No, no I don’t.”

Me: “Well, you know, your lips are all full and soft, like really nice pillows. The nicest pillows have goose feathers in them, so it’s like kissing a goose!”