From Now On, Always Use That Line

(I do returns and am waiting for a price check to come back. The elderly women who is next in line thinks the three-minute wait is too much.)

Customer: “What is taking so long?”

Me: “Someone is checking the price on these boots for me, ma’am. It’ll be just a minute.”

Customer: “Well, it’s taking too long. Can’t you just help me?”

Me: “I only have this one register. It will be just a second.”

(It takes maybe another minute. I get the price and start processing the return.)

Customer: “This is taking forever.”

Me: “I am exchanging items for this customer, ma’am. Just be patient.”

Customer: “Could you be any slower?!”

Me: “Probably, ma’am. Would you like to see?”

Customer: “No! I don’t have time to wait in this line!”

Me: “Well, what else would you do in a line? They’re designed to wait in.”

(At this point an assistant manager had come up, laughing, and took the lady to another register to do her return.)