Friendship Was About To Get Axed

(I’m with my friends when I get a phone call. This is what they hear me say.)

Me: “Hello?” *pause* “Yeah, sure. Where are you up to now?” *pause* “Okay, well, do you have the axe?” *pause* “It’s in the shed in the grove…” *long pause* “Okay, well, talk to the hit-man first… You still have the code, right? Should be in your pouch.” *pause* “All right. Anything else?” *pause* “Okay. Good luck. Let me know if you run into problems.” *hang up*

(My friends are staring at me.)

Me: “Uh?”

Friend #1: “What was that?”

Friend #2: “Yeah. Hit-man? Axe?”

Me: “Oh. Er… helping someone with an online game. She’s stuck.”

Friend #1 & #2: *visibly relieved* “Oh, my god! You scared us!”