(I’m helping to teach a children’s Sunday School class in our church. The lesson is on the Holy Ghost.)

Teacher: “Now what are some things that can distract us from feeling the Holy Ghost?”

Child #1: “Bad music!”

Teacher: “Great! What else?”

Child #2: “P*rnography!”

Teacher: “That’s a good answer! [Child #3], what’s another thing?”

Child #3: *in a deep, raspy voice* “World domination!”

Teacher: “…I’m just going to put down ‘video games.'”

(I have a medical condition that requires a service dog, but it doesn’t keep me from running with her every morning. Part of my route takes me past a high school bus stop. One morning, a mom is dropping their almost-late son off.)

Student: *getting out of his mom’s car* “Hey, it’s the dog guy!” *waves at me like he does every weekday morning*

Me: *waves back*

Student: “Mister, can I ask you something?”

Me: *jogs over* “Sure! What’s up?”

Student: *points to my dog, wearing a blue service vest* “Why do you have a service dog?”

Student’s Mom: *Gasps* “[Student]! What a rude question to ask!”

Me: “Ma’am, it’s okay, really.”

Student’s Mom: “No, it’s not okay for him to offend you like that! It’s very rude to ask people things like that!”

Me: “Really, I’m not offended. I like it when people ask so I can educate others. I have a medic—”

Student’s Mom: “It’s okay. I know you’re disabled so you’re not good at making decisions for yourself.”

Student: *Gapes* “MOM!”

Me: “…I have epilepsy, not a developmental delay, lady.”

Student’s Mom: *turns bright red and zooms off, nearly hitting another car*

Student: “I am so sorry!”

Me: “You’d be surprised; that’s not even the rudest thing I’ve ever been told.”

This story is part of our Epilepsy roundup.

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(It is Halloween. I’m dressed up as a superhero that wears bright red. My friend and I always tap each others shoulder and pretend it wasn’t us.)

Friend: *eating during lunch*

Me: *attempting to sneak up behind her*

Me: *taps her shoulder and immediately crouches*

Friend: *instantly turns toward me, looking down*

Me: “How did you see me?”

Friend: “[My Name], I’m not colorblind. I think I would notice bright red.”

(A friend and I are visiting the local museum to see an exhibition. Outside the entrance is a mechanical dinosaur on loan. My friend and I walk up to have a look. An elderly lady and her three-year-old granddaughter are looking, too.)

Three-Year-Old Girl: “Hello!”

Me: “Hello!”

Three-Year-Old Girl: “My name is [Name]!”

Me: “Nice to meet you! My name is [My Name].”

Three-Year-Old Girl: “I like this dinosaur!”

Me: “Yeah?”

Three-Year-Old Girl: “Yeah, it’s ugly like my mum.”

(While getting on the bus, two elderly but fit ladies push themselves through while commenting on today’s youth not giving way and how things were different when they were young. Still commenting, they push an elderly and disabled lady aside to take the seat she was heading for. Luckily, one of those “ill mannered” youth gave up her place.)

Me: “I know what is wrong with the youth of today.”

Old Lady: *seeing I’m younger although no longer on of the ‘youth’* “Oh, yes?”

Me: “Yes. In my time, my grandparents taught me about respect by example.”

(The old lady huffed and puffed but the disabled one that was pushed aside earlier snickered and smiled at me.)