(My store sells small plush toys amongst other merchandise. A young girl has discovered the My Little Pony ones, and once I let on that I’m familiar with the show, she launches into a speech on which one of her friends is which pony. She has already gone through five of them, leaving only one left.)
Girl: “And Rarity is my best friend, [Name]. She lives in California and she’s going to die soon!”
(My roommate and I decide to watch TV. We put on a popular sci-fi/horror channel since the next program on the schedule is a zombie film that we’re both fans of. Currently a movie that’s in its last 15-20 minutes is on.)
Me: “I’ve never heard of this movie. What’s it about?”
Roommate: “I’ve never heard of it either. Check the description.”
Description: “An evil child is born.”
Roommate: “That’s literally all that it says? There’s nothing else to it?”
(This confuses us even more because currently there are zombies eating people and not a child to be seen throughout the rest of the movie.)
Me: “So the zombie apocalypse was started by the Children of the Corn?”
Roommate: “If that description was accurate, it just raised more questions than it answered!”
(I have gazillions of photos on my iPad, mostly of silly Tumblr posts, which I often share with my friends for a laugh.)
Friend: “Why do you have so many pictures?”
Me: “BECAUSE I WANT PEOPLE TO LOVE ME!”
(My friend and I are taking the bus home from classes. We had been talking about random things when my friend points out a tiny child smiling at us. She talks about being a devoted mother in the future while I would rather adopt older children, if any.)
Friend: *sighs wistfully* “I want babies.”
Me: *also sighs wistfully* “I don’t.”
(My brother (18) and I (15) are in the doctor’s office waiting for our appointments. There is an elderly lady and a boy who looks like her grandson. Thanks to my dad, who is a big fan of AC/DC, Rolling Stones, and other famous bands and singers, I’ve grown up with 60s-90s music. As result I prefer that music over any other type. I have my headphones on and I am nodding to a catchy part of a song.)
Woman: *to the little boy* “Look at this teenager listening to heavy metal or whatever they call it. Don’t ever end up like that.”
(I hear what she says.)
Me: *unplugging my headphones revealing that I am listening to Frank Sinatra* “I’m sorry, were you talking to me?”
(The woman looked embarrassed as everyone in the office heard her and my response. She got up and left, taking the little boy with her.)
