Fresh Popcorn, Stale Mind

(We clean the popcorn machines at the movie theater I work at every night. We leave any extra popcorn in the first machine we cleaned and pop fresh popcorn the next morning. A customer walks up to register as I’m emptying the kettle.)

Customer: “Can I get a small popcorn?”

Me: “Sure.”

(I turn to the machine with fresh popcorn to get her order when she stops me.)

Customer: “I don’t want the stale popcorn. I want the fresh stuff from today.”

Me: “Ma’am this popcorn was just popped; you watched me empty the kettle.”

Customer: “Don’t lie to me. I know you’re just lazy and don’t want to walk the five extra feet to get me fresh popcorn.”

(I walk over to the machine with the old stale popcorn, fill her bag, and ring her up.)

Me: “Is there anything else I can get for you today, ma’am?”

Customer: *takes a bite of her day-old popcorn* “See, now, this is fresh popcorn! You’re lucky I’m not going to talk to your manager for lying to me and trying not to do your job.”