French Makes Everything Sound Dirty

(I’m a stagehand, on tour with a French play. I’m an Anglophone, but, like most Canadians, I took French in school, and I’m a bit of a Francophile, so I have a basic understanding of the language and can speak a little.)

Me: “I need a pipe. Hey! I can say that in French! Je besoin un pipe!”

Francophone Coworker: *laughing* “No, you don’t want to say that.”

Me: “Did I say that wrong?”

Francophone Coworker: “You just said you need a blow job.”

Me: “I am never speaking French again.”