Free-Range Flames

I work in a wood-fired pizza restaurant.

Customer: “Is the fire in your pizza oven organic?”

Me: “It’s all made from wood burning, so, yes?”

Customer: “No, but is the fire organic?”

Me: “The fire itself?”

Customer: “Yes.”

Me: “Yes.”

Customer: “Good. I don’t want my pizza cooked with modified fire.”

I tell a coworker about this interaction to ask if I responded correctly:

Coworker: “No, next time tell him that if he doesn’t want fire to cook his pizza, then we can offer uranium to give his pie that nice healthy glow…”