They Ported The Smell

(I’m the dippy employee in this story. It’s December and the Christmas rush has started, so we’ve been very busy all day. It’s nearly the end of the day and I’m a bit tired. A young man, 16-17, approaches with a port gift set: three small bottles of port in a gift box.)

Me: “Hello there! Do you have any ID?”

Young Man: “No, I don’t.” *genuinely confused* “I didn’t think you needed it for this?”

His Girlfriend: “I have ID?”

Me: “Sorry, but I’d need his ID in order to sell him this—” *I look at the bottle and suddenly realize what he’s actually buying* “—shower gel set! Oh, I’m so, so sorry! I thought it was the port set. The bottles are the same colour and look very, very similar!”

Young Man: “So I don’t need ID?”

Me: “No, not at all. I do apologise. It’s been a very long day…”

(Everyone laughs. He pays for his SHOWER GEL gift set and leaves, chuckling with his girlfriend. The next customer makes a joke about him “making a clean getaway”. Groan!)