Fostering Some Parental Resentment

(I am having lunch with a few of my fellow students at a local college. I am the youngest, at 21, while the others range from their 20s to their 50s. The discussion turns to vacations.)

Woman #1: “I can’t wait until the kids are older so that [Husband] and I can finally start taking romantic getaways or do a big overseas vacation.”

(Her kids are in their early teens.)

Woman #2: “Why not just go now?”

(Her kids are grown with their own children.)

Woman #1: “I don’t feel right about leaving my kids with anyone, and we can’t afford to take everyone.”

Woman #2: “That’s ridiculous. When my kids were young and I felt I needed a break, I just had them put into foster care.”  

Woman #1: “You did what?!”

Woman #2: “Put them in foster care. I could do whatever I wanted while they were there.”

(We are all stunned by her nonchalance at doing this to her daughters. She’s always complaining about them and their lives. A few weeks later, she is now complaining about the treatment she is getting from her kids. She complains that they don’t involve her in much of their family lives and that it’s disgusting how they treat her because all she got for Mother’s Day was a phone call; they live on the other side of the country.)

Woman #1: *To me, later* “She’s lucky she even got a phone call; if I was her daughter I would lose her number and change mine.”

This story is part of the Mother’s Day 2023 roundup!

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