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Finally Off The Hook

, | Working | February 26, 2014

(It is a rather slow day at my workplace. For the past year, one of my coworkers has been trying to hook me up with male customers, which I turn down. Her boyfriend shows up with her son while she goes on break. When she comes back, she is chatting about her son.)

Coworker #1: “Hey, [My Name]. Do you want any kids?”

Me: *restocking my station* “Nope.”

Coworker #1: “Do you want to get married?”

Me: “Nope.”

Coworker #1: “Do you want a boyfriend?”

Me: “Had one. Broke up with him. Don’t want another.”

Coworker: “Why not?”

Me: “I discovered I was asexual and aromantic when I was dating.”

Coworker #1: “So you have sex with yourself?”

Me: “No. It means I don’t want sex, just like aromantic means I don’t want any relationships other than familial or friendly.”

Coworker #1: “Oh my gosh, [My Name]! You’re a woman! You’re made to make babies!”

Me: “No. I am made to make high scores, art, stories, and honor to my God. Possibly even become a CSI.”

(One of my other female coworkers who’s been listening in speaks up.)

Coworker #2: “Amen, sistah!” *high-fives me*

Coworker #1: *fumes off*

Coworker #2: “So, what were those terms again? Because I think I’m one of those, too…”

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