Finally, Mayonnaise That Burns Calories

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(A lady comes into our sandwich shop and orders a sub. Everything is normal until…)

Customer: “Could I get mayonnaise?”

Me: “Sure”.

(I put the mayonnaise on the sandwich.)

Customer: *orgasm noise* “Mooooore.”

Me: “Okay…”

Customer: *orgasm noise* “More mayonnaise!”

(I honestly think a little bit of my spirit died that day.)

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