Filing On The Fly

(I am working on a hobby project at home and a small fly keeps buzzing all over. It is driving me crazy for the better part of two hours and I finally have enough. I reach over and grab an envelope, which is thick and sturdy with whatever is in it, and I start to mercilessly swat and smack at the fly. My wife comes in and just stares at me.)

Wife: “What are you doing?!”

Me: “This godd*** fly is pissing me off! I’m trying to kill it!”

Wife: “You do know that is our marriage license, which I asked you to file three days ago, right?”

(I start to gingerly put it down, embarrassed.)

Me: “I do now… Let me just go file this…”

Wife: “Thank you, darling!”