Failing To Reach New Levels Of Intoxication

(Our small town is located in a “Dry County” which means any business in the county cannot have alcohol for sale. The locals know this but people from out of town and tourists don’t. As such, we get several people (usually already inebriated) asking us where our beer section is. Tired of trying to argue with drunk people that we don’t have one, I made up this excuse.)

Customer: “Where’s your beer section?”

Me: “Oh, it’s up on the second floor.” *our store is only one floor*

Customer: “Okay!”

(This works about 90% of the time and the customer will spend up until 30 minutes trying to find the stairs to the second floor before finally becoming sober enough to realize I tricked them.)