Face/Off: The Toddler Edition

, , , , , | Related | November 30, 2018

(I’m driving my three-year-old daughter home after preschool. She’s very quiet and shy, especially around other kids.)

Me: “So, did anything interesting happen at school today?”

Daughter: “Yes.”

Me: “What happened?”

Daughter: “[Other Kid] pushed me.”

Me: “[Other Kid] pushed you?”

Daughter: “Yes.”

Me: “Where?”

Daughter: “In the wood chips.”

Me: “[Other Kid] pushed you in the wood chips?”

Daughter: “Yes.”

Me: “Did you fall down?”

Daughter: “Yes.”

Me: “Are you all right?”

Daughter: “Yes.”

Me: “Did you tell a teacher?”

Daughter: “Yes.”

Me: “Was it Ms. [Teacher]?”

Daughter: “Yes.”

Me: “Okay. Did she do anything about it?”

Daughter: “Yes.”

Me: “What did she do?”

Daughter: *suddenly loud and gleeful* “She grabbed [Other Kid] and taked his face off!

(I have no idea what actually happened. My best guess is that my three-year-old was describing her fantasy vengeance instead of what the teacher really did. And the next time I saw [Other Kid], he still had a face.)

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