Evidence Cats Are Jerks: Exhibit A

I am walking into work and spot a cat. I’m a massive cat lover, so I call to it. I don’t expect it to respond; in fact, I expect it to run away in the opposite direction.

Instead, though, the cat looks up at me, meows loudly, and then gets up and starts running at me, tail in the air. It meows crazily at me, and I continue with my silly cat noises you do to get a cat’s love.

As the cat draws in, I slowly crouch so I am on a similar level and continue calling. The cat seems to pick up speed. My heart is beating fast; I AM GOING TO START MY DAY WITH CAT CUDDLES!

But then, the cat stops dead, just out of my reach. It meows at me one last time, then totters off happily down the alley.

The little old lady waiting at the bus stop laughs, and my heart breaks.