Under Attack From Bad Signal Goblins

(My boyfriend and I have just moved in together, and our new apartment has spotty wifi in some rooms. I have been the go-to ‘IT girl’ my whole life, with sort of a magic touch for technology.)

Boyfriend: “Ugh, the wifi’s out again.”

Me: “What? Let me see.”

(I walk over.)

Boyfriend: “Yay! It’s back up! Thank you, wifi fairy!”

Me: “Wifi fairy?”

Boyfriend: “Yeah, you’re the wifi fairy from the Router’s castle in the land of the Internet! You bring the wifi with you wherever you go!”

Me: “You’re nuts; I love you.”

Boyfriend: “Oh, s***. It froze. Now I have to summon the IT princess. Wifi fairy, can you contact the land of the Internet, and ask them to send the IT princess, please?”

Me: “Sorry, dude, your princess is in another castle.”