Escalate In A New York Minute

(It’s my birthday and I’m on my honeymoon so I’ve been enjoying a cocktail poolside before heading up to my room with my husband. I’m a little tipsy but in a great mood. A couple enters the elevator and I make friendly conversation.)

Me: “Where are you visiting from?”

Woman: “Ohio.”

Me: “How awesome! We are visiting from New York City.”

Woman: “Oh, I wouldn’t have guessed you are from NYC from your attitude.”

Me: “Well, I can tell you to go f*** yourself, if you want?”

(The woman gives me a shocked blank stare and the doors open to my floor.)

Me: “Well, have a nice day!”

(My husband couldn’t stop laughing.)

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