Entitled Customers Must Share A Hive Mind

(I work in a moderately-sized superstore in a small town near Atlanta. I came here just after I got my degree in art, and it isn’t something that I talk about much, or that I plan on pursuing a further degree while I work. It’s towards the end of my shift and just before Christmas. I’m tired.)

Me: “Hi! Were you able to find everything okay today?”

Customer: “Sure.”

Me: “That’s great!”

(At this point I let conversation die off, since she has two full baskets and I want to make sure that everything is rung in correctly. Towards the end of the transaction…)

Customer: “You shouldn’t take your job so seriously; it’s just a job at [Store]. It’s a beginner’s job, anyway; no one ever goes anywhere if they end up here.”

Me: *in my most chirpy happy voice* “Actually, ma’am, I’m currently working on my Masters degree in psychology over at [University], and my thesis is on a hive mind theory that develops around holiday seasons in stores like this. I thought working here would be the best place to get firsthand case studies. What do you think?”

(The customer goes absolutely silent, scans her card, and scurries out.)

Coworker: “Are you really?”

Me: “Sure, but I’m not going for psychology; my masters will be in art.”

(I skipped my way back to the time clock, my supervisor cracking up behind me once I had told her the story.)