Eggs-pecting Revenge

| Related | November 26, 2013

(I am eight, and my brother is five.)

Me: “If I break three eggs over your head, I’ll give you $20.”

(My little brother runs to our folks to have them witness it, and I repeat my offer. We go out to the driveway. He is wearing swim trunks in the winter, shivering, with a towel around his shoulders. My folks watch curiously from the porch. They knew I don’t have $20, but aren’t quite sure what is going on. With a satisfying splat, I smash the first egg on my brother’s head. He’s grinning, because he’s going to get $20. Yolk and goo are running down his face, but he doesn’t care. I take the second egg and it explodes on his head. I make sure to rub in the shell bits nicely. He’s still grinning, because he’s almost got his $20. I take the third egg, and… walk away.)

Brother: “HEY! Where are you going?”

Me: “If I break the third one, I have to give you $20!”

(He stands there slack jawed, but, to his credit, he doesn’t throw a fit, cry, or get horribly upset. Fast forward a decade. My folks have sent me on a town-wide scavenger hunt for my high school graduation present. I’m on the last clue, and it’s at the bottom of a neighbor’s pool. Unheated. In May. It’s ice water. I strip down and dive in. I see a milk jug full of sand on the bottom of the pool, with a key of some sort tied to the handle with ribbon. I grab the jug, and head up the side of the pool. As I come out of the water, I see my brother. He is standing on the edge of the pool, grinning. In one of his hands is the key to my ’72 BMW 2002. In the other? Three eggs. Yeah, he got his revenge. I still owe him one egg…)

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