Eggs Aren’t The Only Things Getting Beaten

(My restaurant has a deal. If the lunchtime food takes longer than fifteen minutes to deliver to the table, the meal is free. I explain the concept to a table of three customers.)

Me: “If I don’t have that food out for you in fifteen minutes, you guys don’t have to pay for lunch!”

Customer: “Wait. If you take too long and we don’t have to pay, does the price of the food come out of your salary?”

Me: *jokingly* “Oh, no, but my managers do take me out back and beat me.”

Customer: *pauses* “Can I watch?”

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