Be Careful What Jew Say

(I work as an assistant for a university, basically doing anything and everything asked of me by students, staff, and faculty. We have a student copier. It’s a dollar to purchase a card and then you can put money on it. Most people don’t complain because printing is free to somewhat offset it. However, if they only need a couple pages, I’ve been told I can use our copier and do it for them but to judge it on a case by case basis. The only exception to this is textbooks. I am not allowed, under any circumstances, to make copies for students from textbooks. I can’t stop them from buying a copy card and doing it themselves, though. One night, I have a student come up to me and wave his textbook in my face.)

Student: “Hey, can you copy a few pages for me?”

Me: “I’m really sorry, but I’m not allowed to make copies of textbooks. You can purchase a copy card, though. It can be purchased for a dollar from the machine next to the copier in the student lounge. It’s a dollar for the actual card, and then ten cents per page.”

Student: “Are you kidding me?! Why can’t you just copy a couple pages for me. I don’t want to spend two bucks just to make some copies.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but I’m not allowed to make copies from textbooks. I could get in a lot of trouble.”

Student: “Why are you being such a Jew?”

Me: “I’m sorry, what?!”

Student: “A Jew! You’re like those fat cats down in La Jolla. They’ve got a fountain!”

Me: “Sir, you really shouldn’t talk that. It’s incredibly rude and offensive.”

Student: “Screw you. This is America and I’ve got free speech. I can say it all I want.”

(He proceeds to stomp off, leaving me annoyed at his rude behavior. He returns a couple nights later.)

Student: “You done being Jewish yet?”

Me: “Sir, I will not now or EVER make you copies. You will need to purchase the card or go buy your own copier. Good night.”

(I wish I could have done more but by that time of night, there’s only me and a frail old security guard on staff to handle the students and faculty and we can’t force them to give us their names or student IDs. At least I never saw him at our location after the month ended.)