Drive-Thru Now Applies To Solid Walls

(I work in a bank. We have just closed up for the night. My coworker and I are balancing the vault when we hear a loud crash and feel the building shake.)

Coworker: “HOLY CRAP! What was that?!”

Me: “Sounds like it came from the drive-up. You don’t think someone hit us, do you?”

Coworker: “Oh, no.”

(We run out of the vault, across the lobby, and into the drive-up area. Thankfully, there is no hole in the wall, but there is a slightly damaged car parked at an awkward angle in our business deposit lane. The customer in the car looks very confused.)

Me: *through the mic* “Sir, are you okay?”

Customer: “Did I hit something?”

Me: “Yes.”

Customer: “What did I hit?”

Me: “You hit the wall, and you hit it very hard. We felt the building shake. Are you sure you’re okay?”

Customer: “I need to make a deposit!”

Me: “Sir, we’re actually closed for the night. Can I call someone to come pick you up? Your car is damaged.”

Customer: “NO! I’m FINE! It’s still drivable, so I’ll come back tomorrow!”

(He reverses out of the lane at a crazy angle, and speeds off. My coworker and I stare at each other.)

Coworker: “At least there’s no hole in the wall…”