Doo Hickey 3.0

(A customer is in the store with her two early-teenaged grandkids.)

Customer: “I need one of those… those thumb things… You know… thumb something.”

Me: “A thumb drive?”

Customer: “Yeah!”

(I grab one and hold it up.)

Me: “We have these promotional ones here, and the rest are in aisle two.”

Customer: “No, that’s not what I want!”

Me: “Oh, sorry, what are you looking for?”

Customer: “A thing for my phone! I want to plug my phone into my computer!”

Me: “Then you need the cord. You should have one already that came with your phone, unless you would like an extra one.”

Customer: “Oh, right, yeah. I have a cord already, but I need the doohickey so I can plug it into my computer.”

Me: “You don’t need anything extra to plug it into your computer; it will just plug into the USB port.”

Customer: “No, it won’t.”

Customer’s Grandkids: “Granny, yes, it will! We told you the same thing!”

Customer: “No, it won’t! I know what I need!”

Me: “Well, I’m not sure what it is you’re looking for, because your cord will plug directly into the computer.”

Customer: “No, I know it won’t!”

Customer’s Grandkids: “Yes, it will!”

Customer: “Just show me what I need to plug it into the computer!”

(The grandkids are sighing and rolling their eyes at this point, looking embarrassed.)

Me: “I assure you, you don’t need anything extra, just the cord.”

Customer: “No! Nope! I know I do!”

Me: *being very firm* “No, you don’t.”

(Her grandkids are now shaking their heads and laughing.)

Me: “Here, I’ll show you.” *grab a cord and walk over to a computer, turning it around so that she can see, and I plug the cord into the computer* “See? This part here goes into the computer, and the other end goes into your phone. That’s all you need to save things from your phone to your computer.”

Customer: “No, I need something extra! A doohickey.”

Customer’s Grandkids: “But she just showed you! It plugs right in!”

Customer: “Well, I’m old! I don’t know anything about technology! What if I want to save it to a thumb drive after? Then I need a doohickey for my phone.”

Me: “No, then you just plug a thumb drive into the computer and copy the files over.”

Customer: “WHAT?! I don’t know how to do that!”

Customer’s Grandkids: “Granny, it’s fine; we’ll show you how to do that.”

(The customer goes off to find a flash drive and one of the grandkids stays up with me.)

Grandkid: “So, how’s your day going?”

Me: “Good, thanks… And yours?”

Grandkid: *pause* “Interesting.”