Donut Touch My Donut!

Someone from my office was kind enough to bring donuts from a local shop. Being diabetic, I have to be careful what I eat, but I’ve decided that these donuts smell so good I’ll just eat one and take extra insulin. I grab a donut, put it on my desk, and then head to the restroom to inject my insulin. When I return to my desk, I only see an empty paper towel where my donut once was and [Coworker] at his desk.

Me: “[Coworker], did you see who took my donut?”

Coworker: *Defensively* “Diabetics can’t have sugar.”

Me: “We can. We just have to account for it with insulin. Where is my donut?”

Coworker: “I ate it to save you from yourself.”

He has already had two donuts after convincing another coworker that he should not have snacks that would throw off his diet, and mine now makes three. I try to keep my cool, but I hate when people interfere with my medical regimen.

Me: “[Coworker], you had no right to take my donut. I just took insulin so I could eat and now—”

Coworker: “I was helping you!”

Me: “No, you were helping yourself.”

I walk back to the break room, hoping there will be one more donut. There isn’t; the boxes were empty. I stand there for a moment, thinking of what I can do to account for the sugar I was planning on eating. [Manager] walks in.

Manager: “Oh, I was hoping there were more donuts.”

Me: “Yeah. Me, too.”

I begin digging through the cupboard, hoping someone left a snack I could buy from them. Nothing is there. I let out a frustrated groan.

Manager: “What’s wrong?”

I recount everything that has just happened.

Me: “And now I need to find something sugary or I’m going to be in trouble.”

Manager: “Okay, here’s what we’re going to do. You’re going to go sit in my office, and I’ll have [Secretary] keep an eye on you while I’m gone. I’m going down the street to [Donut Shop] to get two more donuts — one for you, one for me. We will eat them in my office, and once we know you’re okay to work again, I will talk to [Coworker].”

I inhaled my donut in record time and thankfully avoided a medical disaster. Though I was not in the room when [Manager] spoke to [Coworker], I heard that he laid down the law with no exceptions. [Coworker] grudgingly apologized for taking my donut but did not speak to me otherwise for several days.