Dry Mouth Versus Motor Mouth

(I’ve had oral problems for years including dry mouth and a severe overbite.)

Dentist: *briefly looks at x-rays, yanks open bottom lip, peers at teeth, grunts, gets mirror* “This is bad. Do you see this? Look. Look at it. This is terrible.”

Me: “Yes, I’ve seen. I’m aware. I’ve had dry mouth for over fifteen years.”

Dentist: “Are you on meds that would do that?”

Me: “No, I have a severe overbite.” *attempts to show*

Dentist: *ignores me, dismisses my statement* “Okay. You have gum disease. BADLY. You have bone loss. We’ll have to take everything before you don’t even have the bones for dentures.”

Me: *stare*

Dentist: “Do you know what gum disease is? Do you? Do you know what it’s doing to you? Of course you don’t. Let me tell you.”

Me: *staring still, bordering on the verge of tears*

Dentist: “If your kidneys failed RIGHT NOW, you wouldn’t even be in line for a transplant. Do you understand me? Not with your mouth like this.”

Me: *silence*

Dentist: “We have to pull everything. All of it. Full dentures.”

Me: *silence*

Dentist: “That’s a quiet face.” *to assistant and intern* “That’s a quiet face isn’t it?” *pokes my nose hard* “Talk to me!” *laughs* “And I’m being conservative! I mean I really am, aren’t I [Assistant]?”

Assistant: “Mmm…”

Me: “What do you want me to say? It’s not what I wanted to hear. I know it’s bad in there. I’ve known it’s bad in there for a long time. Telling me I have to essentially take my face apart is a big deal. I won’t be doing anything today, I’m afraid. I’m not the one funding this; someone else is, so I’ll have to discuss everything with them.”

(Basically, the poor assistant was left doing damage control while I tried not to break down sobbing in a dentist’s office! It didn’t help that the assistant basically told me how beautiful I’d be once they were replaced.)