I Don’t Want To Make A Big Deal, But Here Is A Big Deal

(It’s a Sunday, so there are only two librarians working the library circulation desk. As I come up to the desk to check out my books, both librarians are talking to an older woman.)

Woman: “This is not a big deal; I just want to make it clear that I feel I have been cheated!”

Librarian #1: “Ma’am, while you may have overpaid your overdue fines—”

Woman: “I was told they would be credited against my future fines!”

Librarian #1: “I do not know who told you that, but they were mistaken.”

Woman: “My son says you do it for him all the time. And it’s only a quarter, but—”

Librarian #2: “We’ve never done credits.”

Woman: “—It’s not a big deal if your employee POCKETED TAXPAYER FUNDS!”

Librarian #1: “Ma’am, any excess fine payments are donated to the Friends of the Library, and we always ask beforehand if that’s all right.”

Woman: “It’s only a quarter. I get it. It’s no big deal, but I don’t understand—”

Librarian #2: “Ma’am, if you wanted to bring in your receipt—”

Woman: “I DON’T WANT TO MAKE A BIG DEAL OUT OF THIS, BUT—”

Librarian #1: *exasperated* “Ma’am, here is a quarter; I apologize for the misunderstanding.”

Woman: “Well. Fine.” *takes her book and her quarter and marches out*

Me: *as I step up to the desk* “I’m so glad that wasn’t a big deal.”

Librarian #2: *wearily* “You have no idea.”